Anonymous?

Nope, I’m not anonymous. My name really is Steve.

Alcoholics Anonymous finds it critical to guard its members’ anonymity:

Anonymity […] assures our members that their recovery will be private. Often, the active alcoholic will avoid any source of help which might reveal his or her identity.

And AA describes it as essential to the character of its organization:

Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of A.A. It disciplines the Fellowship to govern itself by principles rather than personalities. We are a society of peers. We strive to make known our program of recovery, not individuals who participate in the program.

Good stuff, certainly. Wouldn’t it be great if life was uniformly about principles more than personalities, and programs were known by their merits more than their leaders or participants?

I respect any person or organization that holds to its deeply-held values, and I can understand how valuing anonymity has served the members of AA.

For myself, though, I believe there can be costs attached to anonymity. It is more difficult, often impossible, for an anonymous person to be publicly accountable. Sealing one part of our lives behind a closed door can imply that shame is being allowed to roam freely.

Honesty can disarm. Illuminating the things I dislike or fear most about myself demystifies them, normalizes them, reveals them as something which need not be hidden away. In my life, leaving shame and anonymity behind has often made it possible to learn more about the world around me at the same time that folks I encounter in the public sphere learn from me.

Betty Ford comes to my mind as one whose journey with substance abuse and recovery has not been anonymous. It wasn’t her choice — in 1978, word of her hospitalization in the alcholism unit of Long Beach Naval Hospital in 1978 reached the press before she even arrived — but it was consistent with her history. She had proven herself to be a pioneer of sorts by talking publicly about breast cancer, and continued that tradition regarding her cosmetic surgery later in 1978.

In her 1987 book, Betty: A Glad Awakening, she talked about being asked to lend her name to the center she helped create:

Somewhere in the middle of the process [of hurdling all the barriers to creating a first-of-its-kind treatment center in California], Leonard [Firestone], Joe Cruse and John Sinn asked if they could call the new facility the Betty Ford Center. I said I was honored, but I didn’t think so. […] They convinced me that it would be beneficial to our cause if I allowed my name to be used. It was definitely not my desire.

I choose not to be anonymous even though it’s not my deepest desire.

I’m glad that it has worked well for others, and I have no problem respecting such choices by folks who contribute their thoughts and experiences here.

I think folks need to know that there are many ways to work toward having a healthy, balanced life in the wake of unhealthy drinking patterns. Folks who are struggling with drinking problems, especially, are likely to benefit from knowing that their peers have used many different paths to better their lives. Telling my story honestly and openly, being accessible and real, is one of the ways I choose to contribute to that process.

I’m Steve Boese. I’m a former problem drinker.

When I did my biography of Grace Snyder, I contacted Sen. Harold Hughes to ask that he write the Foreword, which he did. Harold pointed out to me that he had given up his life in politics to serve Jesus Christ, and he said so. Of course, he also gave much of his life to helping drunks and did so without trying to stay anonymous. As a matter of fact, he founded SOAR with that idea in mind. I personally decided to remain Dick B. in accord with the Traditions because I get sufficient static from mentioning God, the Bible, and Jesus Christ that I didn't need more from the anonymous people. On the other hand, Clarence Snyder, Grace Snyder, Hughes, Ford, and others have done a great service by attracting people to recovery who might never have made it without some willing to stand in the fore. Anyway, I just received a visit to my AA History site from someone who saw your listing of my site. I thank you for this. And I wish you the best in the service you are providing. God Bless, Dick B.